Daisies

You deserve more than the daisies I bought you,

even cheaper than they should be.

I could’ve paid full price, I should’ve,

but she told me,“They’re two dollars a piece,

though you can have them for less.

Everyone has to eat lunch.”

She doesn’t know that I lost my appetite

when, for you, my love handed off dignity,

ripped it away like it was easy.

One night,

crying, screaming, dying.

Today I told you about it,

laughing, gasping, choking.

You looked worried.

Around a table,

counting scars and proving brags,

only you notice me

running out of fingers to count on.

Girls my age turn much younger, much older,

leaning forward through candle light,

holding wide grins like eager weapons,

conspirators in hunt of something that could really hurt.

“Tell us a secret you’ve never told anyone.”

Greedy hands reach out to grab what’s theirs,

but their hands fall though my heart like wind.

There's nothing left to have.

My secrets have already traced your ears,

the words have left my mouth,

spoiled, rotted.

They sit untouched and heavy in our stomachs,

desperate to sicken us and escape

So at the very least, let me buy you more daisies,

even cheaper than they should be.

She won’t let me pay full price

so I’ll get you lunch too,

because everyone has to eat lunch.